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About five years ago, she had a brief affair with a young man. It was all about her getting older and feeling less beautiful and this guy took advantage of her. I found out about it and she stopped right away. To make a long story short, I forgave her and we did our best to carry on as before. But it wasn’t the same. I had lost trust and I guess it was just as well, since she continued to lose confidence in herself and ultimately sought out another man, someone she hoped who could give her back the power of her beauty. ‘She had deluded herself into thinking he would marry her and make her young again, but it was just an illusion. Once again, I found out about the affair and this time, I knew there was no going back. She had changed and she was unrepentant, even threatening, when I confronted her. The divorce was inevitable and worse yet, she lost the love of her children because of her behavior and attitude. She had become completely self-centered and alienated from us. I spent some. Her moral obligations kept her grounded, and she fought the thought of him daily. Sometimes she even got angry at him for even meeting her at all. It was so beautiful, yet so cruel. She can never have him. He had an effect on her like no other. When he spoke, she wanted to obey his every command. When he wanted her, she desperately wanted to be right there with him, pleasing his every need and when she hurt him, or herself, she wanted every ounce of his painful, yet healing correction. She wanted all of him. She wanted to feel his hurt, his anger, his frustrations, his aggressions, and his happiness all over her. She grabbed her paddle and walked out of her door as he demanded. She was nervous, and wanted to turn back, like she had done before. She fought her nerves as she drove and thought about him and what was about to happen. As he opened the door she gave him a nervous smile and giggled. She always felt so nervous with him, yet so happy. He gently grabbed her and pulled her.
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